At the start of 2012 I sat down and looked at my life and made some new
year's resolutions, they were based on the knowledge I had of myself at
that time so they were the general things, lose weight, get a job, take
the kids on an adventure, you know the kind of thing. I am please to
say I have achieved almost none of them :-)
Monday, 31 December 2012
Tuesday, 18 December 2012
Sunday, 9 December 2012
I hate me!
OK maybe not quite that but I hate the me I am right now.
I went to Ikea today, I'd done my research and knew what I wanted, I'd also found that they did same day or next day delivery and for a small charge would take the old stuff away to be recycled so as a girly in need of a new sofa and chairs and the old ones taking away it seemed like a really good and easy plan to go and buy them. What I failed to take into account was the absolute panic attack that comes with trying to spend money!
I spent the first five years of my marriage desperately trying to stop the other half spending everything we had and paying off the very high debt he had and didn't tell me about until we were on honeymoon. £20000 in debt wasn't how I'd intended to start married life but it got sorted and we paid it off before Shorty was born.
After Shorty was born and I was off with her not earning anything I wasn't allowed to spend anything, I got maternity pay but apparently that didn't count and when I went back to uni the bursary only just covered childcare, travel and books so every purchase still had to pass through his hands even down to food shopping which was done at weekend even when I was off all week when Tiny was born.
I haven't used my cash card to buy anything other than food and petrol for more than 12 months and even though I have the money sat in an account to pay for the sofa and that the old one is one of the things I really need to get rid of in order to move on from the ex I just couldn't do it.
What a way to waste two hours of my life!!
Like I said I hate me!
I went to Ikea today, I'd done my research and knew what I wanted, I'd also found that they did same day or next day delivery and for a small charge would take the old stuff away to be recycled so as a girly in need of a new sofa and chairs and the old ones taking away it seemed like a really good and easy plan to go and buy them. What I failed to take into account was the absolute panic attack that comes with trying to spend money!
I spent the first five years of my marriage desperately trying to stop the other half spending everything we had and paying off the very high debt he had and didn't tell me about until we were on honeymoon. £20000 in debt wasn't how I'd intended to start married life but it got sorted and we paid it off before Shorty was born.
After Shorty was born and I was off with her not earning anything I wasn't allowed to spend anything, I got maternity pay but apparently that didn't count and when I went back to uni the bursary only just covered childcare, travel and books so every purchase still had to pass through his hands even down to food shopping which was done at weekend even when I was off all week when Tiny was born.
I haven't used my cash card to buy anything other than food and petrol for more than 12 months and even though I have the money sat in an account to pay for the sofa and that the old one is one of the things I really need to get rid of in order to move on from the ex I just couldn't do it.
What a way to waste two hours of my life!!
Like I said I hate me!
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